The Ultimate Prank
by Amandamoo
Summary: Never let a servant do a prince's job. Co-written by LyricalSinger


A/N: This is co-written by LyricalSinger. I've had this written for about 6 months and have finally gotten around to posting it! Hope you like it! Please R&amp;R!

"_Mer_lin," said the Prince in exasperation as the two young men got off their horses and started tying them up to a tree in a clearing near the river, "why did you tell Gwaine we were going fishing?"

"Well, he wanted to know why I needed the bucket of worms, and I wasn't about to tell him _you_ were getting ready to pull the 'ultimate prank' on the knights," Merlin replied, as though the answer was obvious.

"But _fishing?_" Arthur whined, disgust very clear in his voice. "I hate fishing! Nothing to do but sit and wait; nothing to kill! _And_ we can't just come back empty-handed, as they now know how full the bucket was when we left." Merlin hid a smile, picturing Arthur just stabbing the water with his sword trying to kill the fish.

"It's not _that_ bad, Sire. At least it's a nice day today," said the young Warlock, looking at the sky. He grabbed both fishing poles and the bait unfortunate enough not to be part of Arthur's great prank, and handed half of his load to Arthur as he settled down in a clear spot by the river.

* * *

After about half an hour of bantering, and no sign of fish, the young prince was starting to get slightly restless.

"Are you bored already?" asked Merlin in a mocking tone, turning his slight chuckle into a cough when he saw the look the Prince was giving him.

"Of course not _Mer_lin. It takes a lot more than a simple fishing trip to make me anything less than one hundred percent dedicated to what I'm doing."

"Oh, so I guess it was just my mind playing tricks on me. I thought I'd heard you sigh quite a few times. And I'm sure it was also just my mind seeing your fingers and legs twitching for the last 10 minutes," said Merlin in a mocking tone.

His pride slightly dented and his mood now foul, Arthur snapped angrily, "Well, even bored and tired I'm sure I could still catch more fish than you!" Almost on cue, Merlin's pole gave a small tug.

Merlin smirked at his Prince. "Oh really? Then why is it I have a fish and you don't?" asked the young servant, as he pulled in his line and landed a beautiful bream.

Arthur glared at the fish now flopping on the grass beside Merlin and thought, if he can do it, I can do it better. After all, I'm much better at just about everything, and I'm sure fishing can be included on my list of accomplishments. Turning to Merlin, who had now re-baited his hook and was playing out the line into the river, Arthur said, "How about a little competition? Let's see who can catch the most fish by lunchtime."

"You're on, Arthur. But what does the winner get? It's not a real competition unless there's a prize at the end," answered Merlin with a growing smile on his face. It was a little known fact that Merlin was the best fisherman in Ealdor, and while he'd not really had many opportunities to use his 'fish whisperer' skills while in Camelot, it wasn't a talent one could forget.

"Loser has to clean and de-scale all the fish," answered Arthur as he picked up his pole, re-baited his hook and tossed his line into the river. Arthur was determined to win this competition, not only because he absolutely hated gutting fish – it was a thoroughly disgusting job, and this from a man who had no qualms about running his sword through an enemy when required - but also because there was no way he was going to let Merlin be better at something than he was.

Merlin looked over at his Prince, who was now sitting quietly on the riverbank, gently twitching his fishing line every once in a while and quietly crooning, "Here fishy, fishy. Here's a nice worm for you," then he picked up his own pole, moved about ten feet to the left of his original spot and settled himself down in the grass. He'd noticed that there was a large branch from a nearby elm tree that hung out over the river, creating a cool, shady spot in the water. And, knowing that bream preferred cool water over warm, he was prepared to show up his prince with his fishing skills.

Things were going very well for the first hour or so; both Arthur and Merlin had caught thee fish each, so the score, as Merlin called it out to Arthur was, "Four-three for me!"

"Not fair, Merlin!" retorted Arthur. "You can't count the first fish; you caught it before the competition started."

"Fine," answered Merlin with a grin. "So it's a tie. Happy now?" he asked.

"Yes," came the response.

"Big baby," muttered Merlin under his breath as he turned his attention back to the river and his fishing pole.

Another hour passed, and neither man caught anything. Well, neither man caught any fish …. Merlin snagged a fallen branch and Arthur caught the jitters. He was now bored to tears and starting fidgeting, bouncing his toes on the grass before him and tapping his fingers on the ground in some obscure rhythm.

Merlin decided he'd have some fun with his master being so fidgety. Excusing himself to go and get some snacks for the two of them, Merlin retreated to the first stand of trees, just out of sight of Arthur.

He whispered an incantation and his eyes glowed gold. A tree branch far to his left cracked and fell. As predicted, the fidgety prince jumped at the sound and turned to investigate.

Merlin quickly put into action the second part of his plan; his eyes glowed gold once more and Arthur's fishing pole noisily fell into the water. The Prince swore loudly and ran back to his spot attempting to grab the handle.

To Merlin's surprise, his small entertainment went even better than planned when the Prince slipped in a muddy patch of dirt and fell straight into the water, letting out a very girlish scream of surprise. Choking back a laugh so as not to be revealed, Merlin quickly went to the horses and collapsed in a fit of giggles. After he calmed down, he stayed there just a little bit longer, giving Arthur the time to regain some of his dignity by climbing out and settling himself back down.

When he walked back, Arthur turned to see Merlin pause behind him, fighting back a smile. "One word Merlin, and I swear you will be mucking out the stables for a month," said the Prince menacingly.

Merlin quickly went serious and wisely replied, "One word about what, Sire?" before handing him an apple and then sitting down and putting his fishing pole back into the water.

Another hour passed and by the end of the competition, the count was 8 fish for Merlin, 6 for Arthur. "Ha," shouted Merlin in glee, "I win! Hope you enjoy cleaning fish," he added with a laugh.

Arthur simply looked at his manservant, and in a superior tone said, "I'm a Prince of the Realm; I'm not about to start cleaning fish. We have kitchen staff to do that. Besides, there's no time to indulge in such manual labour; we've got a prank to pull."

"I should have known you'd weasel out of … wait a minute, we've got a prank to pull?"

"Of course, Merlin; you've got to do the 'dirty work', so to speak. Mount up, and I'll explain your duties on our way back to the castle."

* * *

Early the next morning, Merlin trudged unhappily to the knights' changing rooms. They were to be jousting that morning and would require their armour. On their return trip to Camelot after their morning of fishing, Arthur had explained that Merlin would be the perfect person to put this prank into action. After all, it wouldn't do for Arthur to be caught setting up the joke. Of course, that meant that Merlin would likely be the one blamed for any potential mayhem, but then that was the usual case when dealing with one of Arthur's 'brilliant ideas'. Though Merlin didn't really agree with pranking when one didn't deserve it, Arthur was all for it because it would make it that much more unexpected.

On Merlin's reluctant agreement to help out, Arthur had proceeded to explain to Merlin what, exactly, to do with the worms. The only good point about the whole escapade was that it wouldn't require Merlin getting his hands too dirty.

Merlin entered the armoury with two buckets of worms, one containing the leftovers from their fishing trip the previous day and a second he had picked up that morning. Fortunately for Merlin, there hadn't been any knights around at that early hour to ask what he was up to, so Merlin simply let out a deep sigh and set off to work.

Not long after Merlin's task was done, the knights entered the armoury together in the way that men do, laughing and playfully roughhousing. Arthur, though quite excited, attempted to let nothing show of his knowledge in the forthcoming future of his knights. A quick glance at Merlin, who was standing by the sword rack arranging Arthur's gear, let him know that everything was in place.

Gwaine was the first to reach down and grab his boots, all the while grinning wildly at a comment made by Leon. As soon as his foot was in the first boot, he let out a high-pitched scream, kicked his boot off his foot and watched it slide across the floor.

The room went momentarily silent at Gwaine's outburst and everyone stared at the boot now standing forlornly in the middle of the floor. Slowly, the boot tipped over and out came a pile of worms. Everyone burst into laughter, though Gwaine still had a look of horror on his face.

"Leave it to Gwaine to piss off someone enough that they'd put worms in his boots!" howled Elyan, as he proceeded to pull on his second boot. It was his turn to let out a cry and kick it off.

He was not the only one to let out a cry. Suddenly the room was filled with yells and curses as about half the knights found worms in one or both of their boots. Realizing that if he wasn't careful he'd be exposed as the source of the prank, Arthur wisely decided he should also pretend that he, too, was on the receiving end of the practical joke. He proceeded to let out a loud cry along with the other men as he pulled on and then kicked off one of his boots, being very careful to ensure his boot stayed upright.

The remainder of the knights – those who had been slower to start gearing up than Gwaine, Elyan and the others – carefully examined their boots before putting them on. Only a few of them were forced to shake worms out of their boots, but to be on the safe side the majority of the knights decided it would be easier to simply retrieve a new, clean pair of boots from their extra clothing rather than run the risk of having stray worms in their present boots get squished between their toes.

After double-checking their boots, the knights who'd made it through the prank unscathed visibly relaxed and started openly laughing at their not-so-fortunate companions. That is, until they got to the end of their suiting up. Those few knights who unknowingly shoved their hands into their gloves quickly pulled them off again with grimaces on their faces and worm guts on their hands, all to a chorus of laughter from their already-pranked companions.

By now, every single knight had been on the receiving end of the prank and Arthur was ecstatic! His prank had gone so much better than he'd ever anticipated and, best of all, no one seemed to suspect it was him. The knights were all questioning and accusing each other, but Arthur was not subject to any more scrutiny than any else.

Throughout the entire event, Merlin had simply stood at the back of the room with a grin on his face and a gleam in his eye. Suddenly, Leon looked over at the dark-haired servant and said, "Wait a minute! Merlin, I saw you yesterday morning with a bucket of worms, and I heard you tell Gwaine that Arthur wanted to go fishing. I didn't give it a second thought then but … if there's one thing that Arthur absolutely hates, it's fishing! Are you the one responsible for the worms?"

"What?! No; no way!" sputtered Merlin as he looked over at Arthur with pleading eyes. "I would never do something like this. C'mon Leon, you know me! Does this look like something I'd do, especially considering I'm most likely the one who'd have to do the clean-up?"

"Good point, Merlin. You're right, of course. My apologies for accusing you. But if not you, then who could have done this?"

There was a chorus of "I've no idea" and "It wasn't me" from the group of knights; even Arthur joined in with a "If I ever find out …", but he was grinning so hard, it was difficult to understand what he was saying.

Finally, Arthur looked around the room at the grumbling knights and said, "All right, we've all been had. But look, time is running on and we're still no nearer to the jousting field than we were when we walked in here. Let's just chalk this whole thing up to experience and get on with our training. But, I encourage you all to keep your ears and eyes open to see if you can determine whose brilliant idea it was to try to prank Camelot's Finest. Go, and I want everyone mounted up and ready to commence training in 10 minutes. I'll be along shortly."

As the knights wandered out of the room, moaning and complaining and maybe even laughing a little at the absurdity of the whole situation, Arthur turned to his servant with glee on his face.

Checking to ensure there was no one left in the room but the two of them, Arthur grabbed Merlin by the shoulders and shook him while chortling, "That was perfect, Merlin! What a laugh! And the looks on their faces … now that's something I'll remember for a long time!"

Merlin simply stared at his Prince with a stern look on his face, but the beginnings of a smile on his lips. "Really, Sire, do you think they won't eventually figure out who was behind the prank? Though, I will admit it was pretty funny, and I don't think I've ever heard a sound quite like the one Gwaine made when he pulled on his boot!"

"I know … it was priceless! And thank goodness I played along or the game would have been up far too early. But I'm not worried about being found out. After all, I'm their Prince; what can they do to me? Besides Merlin, I'm not the one who actually put the worms in their boots and gloves, am I?"

As Arthur headed out the door, he called back to his servant, "Hurry up and don't forget my helmet like you did last time."

"Of course not, Sire," responded Merlin as he picked up the helmet and trailed after his Master, with a smile on his face and a wicked gleam in his eyes.

As they approached the field, Merlin saw that all the knights were mounted up and joking with each other. Fortunately, they all seemed to have brushed off their morning experience and were now ready to get to work. Arthur was already astride his horse as the dark-haired servant approached and handed him the helmet.

"Arthur, before I forget," said Merlin, "I'm going to be foraging for some medical herbs for Gaius this afternoon, and I don't expect to be back before the dinner bell. I've made arrangements for George to serve you at dinner."

"George! Really, Merlin?" moaned Arthur as he reached down and grasped his helmet. Released of his burden, Merlin turned and hurried off, calling over his shoulder, "Arthur, remember the old saying 'Never send a servant to do a Prince's job'!"

The rather odd comment from Merlin caught the attention of the knights, so all eyes were on Arthur as he shook his head, shrugged his shoulders and raised his helmet over his head, only to have a pile of wet, disgusting, wriggly worms fall around his head and shoulders.

A scream of anguish and a bellowed "MERLIN" followed the laughing servant as he scurried out the main gates towards the forest.


End file.
